Card of the Day: Knight of Cups

The Knight of Cups from the Shadowscapes Tarot.
The Knight of Cups from the Shadowscapes Tarot.

There’s a lot that I love about this card. The hopefulness of it, the movement towards the goal, and way the halo looks kinda like a space helmet and I picture this as a scene from 50,000 Leagues Below The Fae Sea. The Sci Fi Arthurian Saga: Lancelot Goes Swimming. (Though, our friend looks pretty close to finding the Grail, so I guess it’s more likely to be Galahad, right? But I’ve always had more of an affinity for flawed, big-hearted, loves-too-much, queer-as-fuck, heart-first Lancelot.)

It makes me feel silly, and happy, and hopeful. I like feeling these things. They’ve been in short supply lately.

I also love that this card evokes those feelings because the knight is on/in the water, and that’s okay. He’s not drowning. (He’s got his space bubble helmet!) Water is something that has always terrified and delighted me. I am petrified of drowning, and didn’t learn to swim until my 30s. But I love being near the water, and now that I can tread water, I love being in it. So, on a more serious note, this card, for me personally, says that I won’t drown in these terrifying depths and that the way to get to my Grail is to stay in the water.

Critical open-endedness – is “the water” my willingness to stay in limbo, not knowing when or if my springtime love will return? Or is “the water” my inner work around healing codependency and earlier trauma and solidifying my sense of self and my mindfulness and presence and ability to “allow, allow, allow”?

Okay, fine, it’s not really open-ended. Fine, fine. The cards are mine, the journey is mine, the message is mine. Especially a card of the day, I think. This isn’t telling me to stay in the water of my hope for my love – it isn’t saying anything about that. This is about me. My grail is not a relationship with him, it’s a relationship with me. Blah blah self-awareness blah. Kidding! Ish. I am happy that I can see myself here, and recognize how being with myself is the most important relationship and one I have neglected for decades. I appreciate that perspective that tarot offers me on a daily basis, I do.

So, onward. In this water, deep and dark and delightful, towards my goal.

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Gloom Fairy

I'm a genderqueer, queer, poly, kinky, sex-positive, sex-radical feminist and activist and student.

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